The Late Night Outpourings of a Rambling Girl…

So, I’ve not posted anything in forever and a day, which is down to soooo many factors.Having writer’s block on all things blog-wise….my rp blog had a short spatt of activity from moi, but that was mainly fueled by my competitive nature, and thus never destined to last. I’ve my secondlife related fashion blog which I totally intend to update but then I just end up putting the pictures on flickr and never sitting down to blog the what is from where part. And there’s this….a blog that, and apologies because I’m highly likely to do it again, well I havent posted anything because I had the sneaking suspicion that I was doing nowt but moaning, as my dear departed Grandma never actually said (she was northern, she just didn’t talk like that)

Any of you that blog, do you ever get blog envy? Or Flickr envy if you post there? Or even Twitter/facebook/whatever social network jealousy over the fabulous lives everyone seems to live? Now, I know it’s all perception….people may have worked damned hard over their carefully crafted blogs and have spent forever and a day working on stuff, but hey, I’m more ‘spread myself thin through expecting perfection first out of the gate’ kind of girl. And also, I totally know that people can make themselves seem fabulous on blogs and on Facebook, and that not entirely be the case, but there can only be so much of elaboration or tricks of light, right?

Sometimes I think all of my blogging efforts are simply a cry to be noticed, that there’s a part of me that wants to feel important and popular somewhere. There’s the whole idea that the internet makes geeks feel like kings, right? That you can be fantastic because of the monitor to hide behind, that any insecurity either in yourself in general, or in your talents can get cast aside because it’s somehow all that much more remote. Yet, I really don’t feel like that. I feel exactly how I feel in my day-to-day life, like there is no difference. Maybe it boils down to my being a negative mardy arse, although I don’t somehow think its just the tone. Yeah, good one Sara, just being honest about the fact this blog is about as much fun as being a house-elf for the day, that’s totally going to bag you some more readers for sure!!

Maybe its a lack of passion, a lack of vocation and dedication to a cause…maybe I need to find some sort of area of enjoyment that I can wax lyrical on….which would have to either be tv, films or books, but then tbh I’d end up with a review blog, and how interesting would that be to anyone?

I’ve had people tell me that my writing is good, and maybe they’re just people whom love me a whole bunch, so they see something that isn’t there. Maybe, just maybe, I should be prefixing all this stuff with the words ‘dear diary…’

In a total side note, just because it came into my head to commit this to paper, well virtual paper,I keep having these moments that are very meet/cute….I’m pretty much like a dog on heat, but for some strange reason I keep seeing hot guys in circumstances that if I was to actually speak and have it be successful, I’d have the beginning of that novel I’m always threatening to start someday…

Take the other day for instance…..I was walking somewhere, I can’t remember where exactly, was in my usual dollydaydreamer state, and ended up walking into someone because I wasnt looking, looked up and seriously, they were sooo hot I stared just a tad. ok, a lot. It was even weirder, because I remember thinking ‘oooh, very Notting Hill, just needed a drink in my hand’ and then a few days later, it was on tv. Strange. Even stranger still is the fact that I’ve just realised my personality type is on par with Hugh Grant in his bumbling Richard Curtis mode, just without the out of my league squeeze. Weirdness.

Anyway. maybe I just need to focus, for goodness sakes, to find my blogging mojo, wherever it went, and nail it down until I’m, well until Ive actually got some followers.  I am being deadly serious now, but I look to blogs such as the fantabulous one my friend Jem writes  http://beautifulclutter.blogspot.com/ or some of the ones by fellow secondlife-ers (( http://whereisnana.wordpress.com/ http://www.brinksie.com/  http://slipsters.wordpress.com/ to name but a few that I’m into atm)) and I wish I had half their skill, flair and popularity. I think that if it’s not already in there, I should campaign for Urban Dictionary to have some sort of word for blog/social network envy. Because it’s definitely a very real occurence.

Talking of things I love right now, there’s an artist on DeviantArt that I’m totally into right now…mainly because she posts drawings/art etc mainly of all things Whovian and its extended universes. By which I mean she’s about if not more so as huge a Doctor Who/David Tenant fan as me….I most certainly got giddy over her silhouettes of various Who characters, only because it tied in my two favourite things…Jane Austen era style cameo silhouettes and Doctor Who. I was totally having all sorts of geek-gasms over the idea of Who does Regency. Which btw, someone should totally get David Tenant in a starring role in a period drama ((not counting Casanova mainly because it’s the one thing that I really only found him attractive in at the time…now, Blackpool, that something I could watch endlessly….but then I do seem to have a thing for singing men on tv…my latest mega-lusts are towards Matthew Morrison and Darren Criss from Glee….yup, ever since I watched Grease at an impressionable age, all it takes is for some hip action and some sexy singing and I’m a-droolin’)). Anywho, check out Girl-on-the-Moon’s page http://girl-on-the-moon.deviantart.com/

I’m now off to go watch the trailer for Fright Night, starring Sir David of Tenant, for about the hundreth time, and to go get my geek on musing away about all things Whovian…seriously, that series end cliff hanger even now gets my brain’s cogs whirling when I get thinking about it….which thanks to Girl-on-the-Moon’s page, I soooo totally am ;p

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “The Late Night Outpourings of a Rambling Girl…

  1. I can totally identify with the blog envy!! There are some incredibly creative, well written blogs out there – some with followers/subscribers of several thousand – and I can’t help envying their blogs and lives in some cases.

    The trick seems to be to write about what you enjoy and then it doesn’t feel like a chore – I think you’d do an excellent book/film review blog or YouTube Vlog, or a plus size fashion blog because you look SO well put together and have an eye for a buy 🙂 But then I also like your rambles – they’re thought provoking, witty and warm and I always enjoy reading them! Post regularly on whatever springs to mind, find similar blogs to follow and the only way is up (Baaaaabbyy, for youuu and meee nooooow!)

    x

  2. It’s funny because I’ve had blog envy of quite a few of your posts and they’ve significantly raised the bar of my writing. I feel like I’m really good at humour but get challenged by creating depth in the more emotional and dramatic explorations of a character. With your characters, the audience really FEELS it with them. Also the precision of your writing is inspiring and sometimes intimidating to people like me who view themselves as once struggling students trying to sound like a proper grown up. I think it’s a good reminder that the grass is always greener right? Virtual or otherwise….XD

  3. see, this is why I love the pair of you….totally cheered me up and made me realise its about perception…..they do say a person’s worst critic is themselves, afterall….but yeah, I think the trick is to persevere….I think I’m just too darn impatient with myself ;p

  4. Ah blogging, seems so simple but really hard really! I started a while ago and can’t say I’m happy really with any of my posts yet. Am trying for the fat fashion approach but need to get some decent photos and also need to decide if I’m actually that fashionable!!!
    Have had a read through your blog and I feel like this overpowering feeling of deja vu because lots of what you have written reminds me of how I was in the my late 20’s. I had crushes on lots of people – sometimes I think looking back more just because it was something to do than because of being really interested. I did hook up with a few, but my weight and my self esteem always made me second guess their motives and mine. Always felt like I was settling and being grateful for any attention I got.
    I have never met you but from your blog I can tell that you are a wonderfully intelligent, witty, insightful and talented woman. I think you need to give yourself a break about your weight and stop thinking that if you were thinner then your life would be better. Imagine the life you want to be living and start working towards it. Weight be damned!
    Well there endth the rant. Come visit my blog if you want to realise just how well you are doing with this blogging thing!

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s